MRAs make me so fucking frustrated.
There are real, legitimate issues for men to work on! And every now and then, MRAs will talk about them and it’s exciting. But then they wrap it in a dumbass package of misogyny and anti-feminism and rape culture which seems, to me at least, a distraction from pragmatic goals.
Here’s a list of “female privileges” reposted by Manboobz. And there are some *really important points* on this chart, OK?
- More likely to have a teacher of your gender
- Women’s shelters
- Assumed primary parental figure /divorce& family court bias
- More, better contraceptive options
- Lower chance of committing suicide
- Circumcision is illegal
- Emotional encouragment/feelings given more inherent value
These are all huge. Boys are less encouraged in school if they can’t see male role models teaching. Men deserve access to crisis shelters, and indeed, wider recognition that domestic abuse and sexual assault affect them too. Women-as-assumed-primary-parent is also a major feminist issue – a world where couples choose who the primary parent is benefits everyone. Ditto for more contraceptive options – both partners should be able to protect themselves going into an encounter! I feel that worse mental health in men is likely linked to the point about emotion. And as circumcision is an unecessary procedure for most children, it should be left until people are at an age where they wish to consent to it. 18 would be a good age.
I’d add easier to find accomodation – many houseshare adverts specify “women only”, because of a perception that women are safer and, perhaps, cleaner and quieter. Finding a houseshare must be harder as a man.
All these deserve attention and campaign time!
And yet I can’t endorse the poster, because it’s packaged in a snarky anti-woman package:
- Women’s studies
- Not avoided by strangers of the other gender
- general immunity to sexism allegations
Good to know the poster’s author doesn’t believe I should vote, have equal pay, and rights to my own body. And even if he’s in favour of those things, but means “women trying to make things better for women”, or some other odd definition, fuck that noise. The one that really stands out is “Not avoided by strangers of the other gender”. That’s the chilling one, the one which says “I have no idea what living as a lady is like”, “I’ve never been stalked, followed or threatened” with a side order of “you have to talk to me. I’m entitled to your time.”
I really hope that some people in the MRA community are taking the good and rejecting the bad of it, or at the very least, combining their misogyny with also working on these issues. But really, either folk need to split off from MRAs and create a non-misogynist splinter group, or we all need to come together and work on gender-based-activism.
I’d go to a fundraiser for a men’s shelter! I’ll come with you on campaigns for equal parenting rights, protest against male circumcision, and you bet I’ll donate for more male contraceptive options. Will you campaign with me for my rights also?
(also, I’m not sure what’s going on with “less likely to transition gender identity”. Firstly, there’s no statistic there – I think trans women are simply more in the public eye. And while I guess it’s good to be cisgender and avoid the difficulties of living as trans in this bigoted society, I think the implication here is quite unpleasant.)